I am moving forward. I got so sick this year that I was not able to accomplish things. If I can’t accomplish things, it bothers me negatively even though I had an acceptable reason. Now that I am feeling better, I’ve been cleaning up around the house. I feel really good to get things done. I am seeing a physical trainer twice a week. The more I exercise, the more I want to ride my bike and swim and the better I feel. I finally started to de-clutter my room. It feels good. The more I accomplish the better I feel. I feel like I am winning this mental and physical battle. You have no idea how much better I feel. I am smiling while I write this. I am smiling more. I am sleeping better. Sometimes, I have a bad day. However, the bad days seem to be less and the good days are increasing. I am so thankful for all of the prayers I received from friends, family, and people I don’t even know. I am so grateful for the life I have. Things are turning around. Thank you; all of you. Scans are coming up next week, please keep those prayers coming. Thank you so much for all the awesome support.
I am so grateful for all the good sparks sent my way.
Yesterday I realized that not only have I reprogrammed my mind to believe every ache has to be cancer but it seems that some of my friends followed in my foot steps and have reprogrammed themselves to believe any ache and pain I talk about, has to be cancer.
Then I felt bad and had to back track. Yes chemo intensifies pain but it more than likely does not mean cancer. If I am angry, my anger is intensified, if I have arthritis well that is intensified too. Chemo makes every day pain intensified.
I know the difference between cancer bone pain and intensified arthritis. There is a difference to me even though you may not know the difference. Chemo intensifies pain and it is up to the patient to decipher which is what.
I am feeling better. The second week of chemo instensifies pain and intensifies the lack of comprehension and to keep a full thought. That is where I am this week.
This is the verse that showed up in my email today and it fits how I feel and how I pray you feel about any situation.
Romans 5:3-4 NIV
Not only so, but we also glory in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope.
Not only does suffering produce perserverance which produces character and character hope; but hope produces belief and belief produces faith.
So my dear friends and family, I may have pain and suffering and I may talk about them. However, never forget that I also have perseverance, character, hope, faith, and belief.
I am a survivor. Don’t feel sorry for me. Feel happy that I know these things. Take these gifts for yourself and apply them to your entire life. Have Joy.
That’s it! We’re breaking up!
Zapper of strength,
You cannot define me anymore.
I am not some person to control.
I found the key.
I removed the chains.
No, I will not forgive you.
No you may not take anything with you.
What’s mine, is mine.
You have nothing but yourself.
Loneliness you cause, loneliness you are.
Selfish behavior will no longer get you anywhere.
I am tired of the messes left all over my house.
The capability to clean up after yourself is absent.
Disaster is your middle name.
This is my house and I am kicking you out.
Everything in my house stays.
May you never experience mercy.
May you never grow.
May you die alone.
Do not ever come back!
It is over!
I am just wondering how people handle negative thoughts. How do you handle a hard situation? Do you let all the emotion happen and feel the whole moment or do you switch to a positive moment and not allow yourself feel the real situation? What do you feel is the best way to handle yourself?
Through out the years
My capabities were questionable.
Couldn’t do anything right.
Getting by on just looks really isnt a way of life.
Now, I am capable of everything.
I can still be whatever I want.
words of wisdom guide my life.
You look out for me.
Ah you just love me
Chocolate candy kisses.
Oh you love me.
Kiss me and I know your love is real.
Every evening I take a walk
Checking out the town.
Trying to find that special friend that cheers me up when I’m feeling down.
Then you find me, I see it in your eyes, your expression gives me butterflies.
You just love me.
I am the luckiest girl.
With an honest man.
You just love me.
It’s because you love me and you bless me so much.
You give me what I need and so much more.
I’d follow you everywhere.
I love the gifts you give to me.
I just love you.